Klepto & Kea
Article by Hugo Blue
FIORDLAND—A parrot in New Zealand got in on the latest TikTok trend of joyriding with a stolen camera when it snatched up a tourist’s GoPro along the Kepler Track.
The pickpocket in question, the Kiwi Kea, is the world’s only alpine parrot—and an endangered one at that—which may account for its lo-ki sense of entitlement to the belongings of tourists. Notoriously mischievous, these purse-snatchers plainly enjoy helping themselves to wallets, jewellery, and in one instance a Scottish man’s passport.
The Kea captured the panoramic vista of the hillside in an obvious parroty of Stanley Kubrick’s The Shining. Emphasized as the clip concludes with a closeup of the bird violently beaking up the camera.
Authorities have since used the footage to identify the assailant in their case.
Meanwhile, in meta-land, CEO Mark Zuckerberg, who recently lost over $200 billion in market capital, showcased the event as evidence why his company needs to pivot to video content.
Amelia Bastos, author of a study teaching keas to use digital touch screens says, “we need to keep them away from human environments as much as possible.”
This is due to the many human hazards contributing to their declining population. Apps like Angry Birds have been detrimental to their attention spans, proving almost as damaging as their rampant bouts of kleptomania.
If we can train keas to use touch screens, why not just give them their own phones? Think of the ad revenue! And then maybe they won’t steal our stuff so much.
Editor’s Note: See video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNjanoLuSFI
An article from The Edville Gazette appears on News Now Network sites once a week. There is also a podcast for your listening delight https://anchor.fm/radiofreeedville.
#theedvillegazette, #humour, #edville
